So, I had my doctor appointment today to get evaluated as to whether I'm good enough shape to go back to work. Of course, it had to be on a day that I actually got an "okay" sleep...not great, but at least okay. It was the first time in months that I'd had even an okay sleep, so I felt...okay. Better than I had in a while. So I was actually nervous once I finally got to the office and was waiting in the room for the doc. It went good though. She did recognize that I'm basically a mess, and need to be off the for at least the full 30 days. So, I won't have to go back to work until the 29th at the soonest. A few days before that, she wants me to come back and get re-evaluated and see where I'm at from there. I'll either get more time off, or go back on a modified schedule. ie, part time hours at full time pay. If I end up doing that, we'll play it by ear and see how I handle it.

She also suggested anti depressants. Since I've had problems with depression and anxiety since I hit puberty, she figures that councelling ain't enough. That it's an ongoing problem. As much as I don't want to be on medication, she's probably right. So, I'll try that until I can get it together and get stablized, and see if I can go off them at that point. She also suggested looking for another job too. Which I've considered, but haven't had the energy to start looking. Eventually I will. But when you don't have enough energy to get out of bed, it's pretty daunting to think of looking for work. My goal is still to finish writing my book, get it out there, and see if I can create enough of that passive income to live on and go from there.

At least for now. I have time to what I want, and to get my head together, and still have a paycheque so I can survive.

This is all good! I couldn't believe the sense of relief when I knew that I wouldn't have to walk back into that office for at least 2 weeks. A huge weight has bee lifted from my shoulders.

Okay...that's all for now. Danard has already started watching the movie he rented. Gonna go join him...

It also occured to me that I'm past my "30 day" goal of changing my life, so I thought it would be appropriate to do a recap, but I think I'll do that later tonight, or tomorrow.

Stay tuned,
Morgana